RFK Jr. recently called America’s declining birth rate a “national security concern.” He went on a disturbing rant about how teenage boys’ sperm counts are supposedly half of that of 65-year-old men (which is biologically implausible), and how girls are supposedly hitting puberty years earlier.

I don’t mean to sound like an alarmist here, but let’s be real for a second: why are we linking “national security," teenage sperm counts, and early puberty in girls? This line of concern doesn’t just sound off — it sounds sinister.

Why is it selfish for a childfree woman, man, or anyone to thoughtfully evaluate their life and decide they don’t want to be a parent? Why is it selfish to recognize that maybe they don’t have the resources, the energy, the emotional bandwidth, or the desire to raise a child and then make the responsible choice not to? That’s not selfish—that’s honest. That shows self-awareness and emotional intelligence.

So many women spend years assuming they must want kids at some point because that is what literally everyone tells us. It’s “natural.” It’s “what women are made for.” It’s the inevitable next step after marriage, or hell, even just the next step after turning 30. But here’s the secret no one likes to admit: wanting kids isn’t automatic or guaranteed. It’s not some biological switch that flips on at a certain age.

When a woman says she wants kids, she is celebrated. Baby showers, glowing compliments, Instagram and Facebook likes galore. She’s celebrated as a perfect, selfless, nurturing woman who is fulfilling her “true purpose.” But when a woman says she doesn’t want kids? Suddenly, the celebration stops and the interrogation begins. She’s so selfish. Cold. Immature. Broken. Questioned over and over again until she either defends herself or stays silent.